5 Ways To Tell Your Parents That You're Keeping Hermit Crabs In Their Cereal Box
#1: Serve them bowls of cereal and just before pouring the milk, speak into the bowl "heeeeere comes the ocean Terry".
#2: Submit yourself to the local news and have reporters come to the house to interview the crabs.
#3: Add warning label to the box reading "May contain seashells and living crustaceans."
#4: Pretend that they moved in of their own accord and now have chosen you as their owner, so to abandon them would be deadbeat behavior.
#5: Set up a Roth IRA for each crab and make your parents the emergency contact.
If you or a loved one have been negatively affected by hermit crabs please reach out to rudy giuliani at rudynotthemovie@NY.gov.